Tomorrow is the 8-year anniversary of my father's death. I am missing him a lot lately. Fucking cancer...
We were very close. Some times so close that we drove each other nuts. Sometimes he was an asshole. Sometimes I was a manipulative little bitch. But I loved him so much and he taught me so much and he is really the reason I am the person I am today.
I have this flash of memory from my wedding day that I have never shared with anyone. The rest of the wedding party had walked into they sanctuary and it was my turn. The music changed and the wedding coordinator looked at me and said "Are you ready?" As I looked at the door I was about to walk through, this thought cracked across my brain
"I wish my Dad was here"
And that's all I really have to say today.
Showing posts with label wishing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wishing. Show all posts
Friday, June 11, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
If....(sparked by a question on another blog)
If I had the time, money, and no other responsibilities I would:
1) Buy some big old cool looking car with a bench front seat. (Like a Charger or a Gran Torino.)
2) Get a cool tattoo on my upper left arm (design yet to be determined).
3) Buy some expensive, kick-ass awesome cowboy boots.
4) Put on Levis, a tank top, my belt with the big sterling buckle, the expensive cowboy boots, get on Route 66 in Oklahoma and drive the big car across the Southwest with the windows open and my bad-ass tattoo displayed 'cuz I have my left elbow on the ledge of the open car window.
In my fantasy I would drive for days in the heat and dust, sleep in the car, drink regular Coca-cola, have leather bracelets on my wrists, and not give a shit about anything. I would stop at diners for pie and coffee. I would buy cool jewelry and cheap trinkets and dye my hair black with white-blond highlights. I would pick up a guy who looks like Chris Cornell and there would be lots of fucking. In heat of the car in the desert. In the cool morning dark of cheap motels. I would point that big ol' car to the west and drive into the sunset smoking cigarettes. I would clear my head of all the "if onlys" and "whys" and "why didn't yous" and just drive and drive and drive...
1) Buy some big old cool looking car with a bench front seat. (Like a Charger or a Gran Torino.)
2) Get a cool tattoo on my upper left arm (design yet to be determined).
3) Buy some expensive, kick-ass awesome cowboy boots.
4) Put on Levis, a tank top, my belt with the big sterling buckle, the expensive cowboy boots, get on Route 66 in Oklahoma and drive the big car across the Southwest with the windows open and my bad-ass tattoo displayed 'cuz I have my left elbow on the ledge of the open car window.
In my fantasy I would drive for days in the heat and dust, sleep in the car, drink regular Coca-cola, have leather bracelets on my wrists, and not give a shit about anything. I would stop at diners for pie and coffee. I would buy cool jewelry and cheap trinkets and dye my hair black with white-blond highlights. I would pick up a guy who looks like Chris Cornell and there would be lots of fucking. In heat of the car in the desert. In the cool morning dark of cheap motels. I would point that big ol' car to the west and drive into the sunset smoking cigarettes. I would clear my head of all the "if onlys" and "whys" and "why didn't yous" and just drive and drive and drive...
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